Latest on twitter:

*88
Well, I guess that is it.
You can follow Danger Guerrero over HERE, and on twitter over HERE. I’ll be over HERE and HERE.
Otherwise, it has been fun you guys. BYE!

Well, I guess that is it.

You can follow Danger Guerrero over HERE, and on twitter over HERE. I’ll be over HERE and HERE.

Otherwise, it has been fun you guys. BYE!

*11

SBTB Mailbag, Vol. 4

alimahmad: Do you think that Michelle Slater, Jeff Winger’s hot professor girlfriend from Community’s first season, was named Slater as an intentional reference to SBTB? Britta is blonde, and shorter than Slater, just like Zack.

LS: No? Maybe?? Probably??? Honestly, I have no idea. This might be a thing Dan Harmon did. I don’t function on enough levels to understand why he named her Michelle Slater, or what the shit that might possibly mean.

DG: I bet you smoke an absurd amount of pot, alimahmad.

Anonymous: if you could change anything about this blog, what would you change?

LS: I would have made it funnier.

DG: MORE KAPOWSKI GIFS.

newamsterdamlemonade: In your well-educated & nuanced opinion, how did Tori’s fashion sense rank with the other regulars?

DG: I’m pretty sure the producers of this show think that if you put a leather jacket and motorcycle helmet on a bunny rabbit, people would just start throwing their lunch money at it and then run off crying.

LS: Personally, I think they were trying to goad the executives at NBC into cancelling the show. NBC called their bluff.

Anonymous: What are you most proud of with this blog?

LS: Not being sued by NBC or ending up on the H8Rs show Mario Lopez had for about 45 minutes.

DG: I was just honored to be included. It was nice to have somewhere to put my dipshit theories about this show instead of forcing them on my friends when they’re trying to hit on girls at a bar.

Anonymous: Can you talk about the time Screech acted like he was from another planet for an episode? Why did he do that? God, Screech is the worst.

DG: Look. I’m not a mental health professional, but Screech almost definitely had some sort of mental/personality disorder like Asperger’s or autism, right? Or both. Probably both. Trying to explain his actions or figure out his motivations is a decent into madness that is outside my area of expertise and above my pay grade. He is a troubled, troubled young man, and I wish him nothing but the best as he fights to overcome whatever ails him.

LS: The only thing I have to say about this episode is the US Air Force should be absolutely embarrassed and ashamed of themselves. They sent some hot shot captain out there to investigate a UFO, and this guy actually believed that Screech was an alien! What the shit is going on over at Air Force HQ, or wherever, where they can’t tell the difference between an alien and a 12-year-old kid with a bunch of ping pong balls glued to his head?? If WWIII ever goes down we are totally fucked.

The DD: Is it wrong that I sincerely enjoy the scene in “Starship Troopers” where actor Patrick Muldoon (AKA creepy ass Max manager Jeff) gets his brain sucked out of the top of his skull by the brain bug, and actually severely dislike Patrick Muldoon as a person because of his Jeff portrayal? Am I too invested in childhood memories of SBTB or did he just sell his performance that well? I’ve take a lot of Nyquil and drank a bunch of wine and have been thinking about this for far too long now.

DG: You are certainly justified in feeling that way but HOLY MOLEY. Wine AND Nyquil?! Who are you? Aerosmith? (FUN FACT: One time I drank some bourbon after taking Robitussin and the next morning I found a file in my phone titled “Idea” that contained only the phrase “dinosaur boobs.” I would give anything to know where I was going with that.)

LS: I have absolutely nothing to say about Patrick Muldoon in “Starship Troopers,” so I’m going to talk about DG’s “dinosaur boobs.” Is it possible that you were working on a spec script for that early 90s show that part of ABC’s TGIF lineup, “Dinosaurs?” I can see it now, the teenage girl dinosaur is upset about being the last dinosaur to need a bra or something, and she wants to get breast implants, a bunch of weird stuff happens, the baby dinosaur yells “Not the mama!” while beating the dad over the head with a frying pan and then she ends up getting dinosaur boobs at the end of the episode. THE END. Yeah, that was probably it.

DG: <3

*13

SBTB Mailbag, Vol. 3

Anonymous: Please list the following teachers in order of their importance to bayside: mr. tuttle, mr. testaverde, the deaf lady teacher, mr. dewey, the blind lady teacher, and the cooking class teacher who sings while she cooks. Show your work and feel free to add any I’ve forgotten.

LS: Here are my rankings:

  1. Mr. Tuttle - That guy taught every single class at Bayside. MVP.
  2. The Home Ec Teacher - She is the only person I’ve ever seen on TV who loves cake more than me. Personal MVP.
  3. Mr. Testaverde - Micro machines guy, based on that alone I give him a C+. Maybe a B-.
  4. Mrs. Simpson (Deaf lady teacher) - I barely remember her.
  5. Mrs. Culpepper (Blind lady teacher) - She would have been a great foil on a show like “2 and a Half Men.” Blinds are soooo funny! And Ashton could try to seduce her. Soooo funnier!! FRRT.

DG: My favorite thing about Mr. Tuttle was his super weird relationship with Belding. Those two were ALWAYS butting heads and stuff, often right in front of the students. I loved that. I badly wish I had gone to a high school where the principal and teachers talked shit about each other all day.

Also, do you think the Micro Machines guy bought millions of dollars worth of stuff during the 90s when he was on every show/commercial and cash was rolling in, and now he’s broke offering to talk really fast on the side of the highway for food? I bet he is.

Anonymous: effkillmarry: leslie spano, wheelchair melissa, mrs. belding

LS: F - Leslie Spano (although I’m obviously too young for her); K - Mrs. Belding (just because she actually married and reproduced with Mr. B); M - Wheelchair Melissa (the woman was a saint for putting up with Zack for 3 whole days, or whatever time period that was in the SBTB universe).

DG: Samesies.

kdbaross: Is there even one acceptable adult role model in any of the 86 episodes? Say what you will about Miss Bliss but at least she had her shit together.

DG: I would argue that Lisa’s mom was okay, in the episode where Zack jacked up his knee. There aren’t even many shows TODAY that show black women as successful doctors, so that was nice. On the other hand, all the hours at the hospital meant she didn’t spend that much time with her daughter and tried to compensate for this lack of affection by buying her stuff, filling the hole where a parent’s love should be with material goods, turning her daughter into a spoiled brat who valued things and money over people and education. So, to answer your question, no. Everyone on this show was terrible.

LS:  Dude. This isn’t 7th Heaven. Everyone was the worst. Wait, everyone on 7th Heaven was the worst too. I’ve lost my train of thought.

Anonymous: Could you beat up that girl wrestler?

LS: Absolutely not. Not even on my best day.

DG: Maybe if I had a sword or a gun and she was asleep. Otherwise, no.

catherinemarynotmarycatherine: Is Zack Morris your idol? …If not, he should be.

DG: Kind of. I’m glad you brought this up, because I have a theory: Zack was awesome in high school, but I think he would be in jail today. Given what we know about his entrepreneurial nature, charm, and his moral flexibility, I bet Zack started an investment business right out of college and made MILLIONS, but then I bet he started playing fast and loose with the company’s finances. He always managed to fix it in time — because hey, he’s Zack — but then when the economy tanked in 2008, his business went south and his book-cooking came to light. I bet he’s doing 20 years in a Club Fed for securities fraud.

And, yes. The astute reader will recognize almost this exact rant from the discussion LOLSLater and I had about “Hawaiian Style.” I’m very passionate about this.

LS: Not exactly. If I had to compile a list of idols it would probably go something like this:

  1. Martin Luther King
  2. Dalai Lama
  3. Zack Morris
  4. Whoever ends up murdering Ashton Kutcher.
  5. My dad.

Hypothetically speaking of course.

*7

SBTB Mailbag, Vol. 2 

Anonymous: effkillmarry: mr. dewey, rod belding, jeff the waiter

DG: Easy. F - Rod Belding (he’ll be gone in the morning anyway). K - Jeff (twice if possible). M - Mr. Dewey (teachers get great benefits).

LS: I have nothing to add. I’d FKM the exact same characters for the exact same reasons. Although, I think Rod Belding would be a selfish lover and a pretty shitty lay. I’m just sayin.

Read More

*12

SBTB Mailbag, Vol. 1

Good afternoon, nerds and welcome to the LOLSlater/Danger Guerrero “Saved By the Bell” mailbag. You asked a bunch of serious questions, and we provided a bunch of idiotic answers to those queries. I’m just kidding. Your questions were just as stupid as our answers. ANYWAY, I’ll publish a few questions today, a few questions tomorrow, and then we’ll never speak of SBTB ever again. Good? Excellent, enjoy.

Read More

*79

LOLSlater and Danger Guerrero’s Top Five Saved By The Bell Moments:

#1 - The Break Up

DG: For #1, I think we need to touch on the central issue throughout the show’s run: the on-again, off-again romance between Zack and Kelly. While there are lots of moments from the show to choose from on that topic, I think the best example is the break up scene at the dance. There is simply too much to get to — and I am entirely too excited about getting to it — to discuss this in any sort of narrative form, so I’m going to hit it in bullet points:

  • First and foremost, for all the love and adulation I heap on Kelly as my first big crush, let’s be perfectly clear about something: she was the worst. Over the course of the show, she dated a million losers — usually creepy old douchecanoes. We discussed the Brian Hansen debacle in our gigantic “Hawaiian Style” breakdown, but Jesus, at least that guy had a career. In this scene, she’s kicking Zack to the curb for a dipshit haircut who manages a diner. I know the show ended on a happy note with Zack and Kelly getting married, but let’s stop kidding ourselves, okay? Knowing everything we know about Kelly’s family situation and her predilection for troublesome weasels, there is no way she didn’t end up married to a drunk with a motorcycle who left her after she popped out kid number six at age 25. I’ve seen that Lifetime Movie. I know how the story ends.
  • Jeff was an asshole and I hope he died sad and alone.
  • Zack was an absolute prince about this whole thing. If my high school sweetheart had dumped me in the middle of a dance for some jamook diner manager, I would have flipped over that picnic table and started saying things so obscene that would it make prisoners in a Supermax prison tell me to take it down a notch. But Zack’s all “I’ll always love you” and “Let’s have one more dance” and stuff. Jesus Christ. Dude makes Ryan Gosling look like Rampage Jackson.
  • As the dance ends, and Zack and Kelly share their preposterous break up dance, Slater and Jessie go up on stage to sing a song. This is all well and good until they open their mouths and HOLY MILLI VANILLI that is the worst lip-synching I have ever seen. I can’t for the life of me figure out why they had them lip-synch. Either: a) The two of them can sing and you just let them sing, because no one would expect two kids singing at a dance to have high end production value anyway, or; b) Just have someone who can sing do it, and cut to a shot of Jessie and Slater dancing or something. Totally unnecessary. I love it dearly.
  • One more note on the song: I know “How Am I Supposed To Live Without You?” makes sense for your big break up scene between the two main characters, but… uh… isn’t it like THE WORST song to end a high school dance on? “Hey everybody, hope you had a great time with your respective boyfriends and girlfriends, all wrapped up in the wondrous feeling of teenage love and happiness. Here’s a song about a dude who is friggin CRUSHED about his girlfriend leaving him for another guy! Enjoy!” I just imagine all the other kids at the dance trying to share a moment with their sweeties looking around all horrified while Slater and Jessie are belting out one of the most depressing songs imaginable. Mass confusion and awkwardness. It’s a crime this wasn’t captured on camera.

Anyway, I’m going to stop there because there is only a finite amount of space on the Internet and some of it should probably be saved for launch codes and stuff, but believe me, I could go on. What do you have on this little piece of American treasure?

LS: You know I’d like to say I have a lot to add to what you just said, but let’s be honest; no one on planet Earth has given this scene more thought than Danger Guerrero. It is an absolute fact and I would be willing to take an oath and testify in front of Congress to that effect. Congress would be interested in something like that, right? Here are my only thoughts on the whole thing, also in bullet point format:

  • I’d like to club Jeff in his pervy, pedo-nuggets.
  • I’d like to make Kelly feel insecure about her decisions to date sex offenders and certified sociopaths, but in her defense, I believe the 13th President of the United States, Millard Fillmore once said, “If you liked it, you shoulda put a ring on it,” which Zack did not do, so…
  • Zack’s response to this whole thing is just astonishing. He basically just says, “Um, okay. Have fun dating the guy from Starship Troopers. I’m glad we’re still BFFs!” WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? If I had been a writer for this show the next three episodes would have been nothing but Zack laying in bed listening to Jon Secada songs on repeat, while Kelly and Jeff vacation on Whore Island.
  • You know what, now that I think about it, I don’t even blame Kelly. I mean, Jeff was probably at least 21, right? BOOM. Free source of beer. Go on girl, get some.
  • My favorite part of the whole Jessie & Slater song bit was that right before they sang they realized Zack, of “Zack Attack” fame, was missing so Slater, who usually plays the drums, just points at some random kid in the audience, tells him to play the drums, and he does so seamlessly. They should have kicked Zack out of the band right there and saved us all from his “Mr. Madonna” phase.
  • Final thought on the dance: There were two black people at the costume ball besides Lisa, guess what they were both dressed as? PRISON INMATES! I’m totally serious. They were both dressed in those old timey black and white stripped prison outfits. So there we have Zack and Kelly dressed as a prince and princess, and the two black dudes are dressed as criminals. CONGRATULATIONS COSTUME DEPARTMENT! WHITE HOODS AND GRAND DRAGONSHIPS FOR ALL OF YOU!! FRRT.

This was easily the best SBTB moment, and this is well over 1000 words so I’m going to quit right there. We’ll see you next Tuesday for the mailbag. Submit your questions HERE or HERE, and have a fun and safe new year. Love you, bye.

LOLSlater and Danger Guerrero’s Top Five Saved By The Bell Moments:

#2 – Lisa, Let Me Buy You a Soda! 

LOLSlater: I went back and rewatched this episode just so I could be sure I wasn’t dealing unfairly with the content of this episode, which I understand, after being unfair to all of the episodes of SBTB over the course of two years seems a bit disingenuous, but I think if we are going to talk about slavery, I should be sure, and I’m sad to report NOPE, I wasn’t being unfair at all. This episode is just really not good. For those of you that haven’t been faithfully documenting the banal minutiae of SBTB over the course of two years, here is my brief synopsis of the plot: 

The class given an assignment to research and report on their ancestry for history class, wherein Jessie discovers her ancestors were slave traders. This fills her tremendous guilt and shame, especially towards her (look both ways, whispers out of the corner of her mouth: “black friend”), Lisa. Now Jessie must come up with a way to atone for the sins of her forefathers, and this is what she comes up with. I’m not making any of these up:

  • Apologizes – OK, good start.
  • Offers to buy Lisa a soda – Oh no she didn’t.
  • Offers to buy her a tossed salad – Somehow worse.
  • Offers to carry her to the mall on her back – Oh God, please stop talking.
  • Offers to carry her books – This subplot is rapidly approaching DEFCON 5 levels of bad idea.
  • Offers to give her a book bag in exchange for “freeing her of the burden of her ancestors” – A nuclear bomb of stupidity just detonated.
  • Offers to repave her driveway – Somebody come get this bitch. 

The plot is tied up nicely when Jessie and Lisa share a black & white cookie and Barack Obama is elected president 15 years later. Or something like that. Anyway, FIVE STARS! A++! Way to deal with the painful history of slavery in fewer than 4 minutes! I guess the moral of this episode is: I owe everyone some salad & soda…maybe a new driveway too.

Danger Guerrero: Ok. I am just going to brush COMPLETELY OVER the fact that Zack showed up to class in full Native American dress at one point in this episode, because I have some more thoughts on the Jessie-Lisa thing. I can’t get over the gigantic titanium balls everyone involved in this episode must have had to think this was appropriate. I imagine it went something like this:

 

Writer 1: Ok, so we’ve broken stories covering [looks at notes] cut day, the SATs, a dream sequence where everyone’s famous, going steady, and having a summer job. Anything else?

Writer 2: How bout something a little more serious?

Writer 1: Like what? Someone’s parents getting divorced?

Writer 2: No. MORE serious.

Writer 1: You mean like those episodes we did on homelessness and addiction?

Writer 2: Getting warmer.

Writer 1: I like it, but what’s more serious than poverty and a crippling dependence on drugs? Wait… you don’t mean…

Writer 2: [smiling and nodding]

Writer 1 and Writer 2: [in unison] SLAVERY!

Writer 1: Genius. What did you have in mind? Something about the gang learning about it in class?

Writer 2: Yeah, but wait till you hear the best part. What if Jessie’s parents captained slave ships?

Writer 1: OH MY GOD YOU ARE BLOWING MY MIND WITH AWESOME RIGHT NOW. What else?

Writer 2: That’s all I got. Let’s just have her offer to buy Lisa some soda or something and then have Zack show up dressed as an Indian. Kids love Indians.

Writer 1: Love it.

Writer 2: God, this is good cocaine.

*83

LOLSlater and Danger Guerrero’s Top Five Saved By The Bell Moments:

#3 - No Hope With Dope

LOLSlater: If there is one thing that “Saved By the Bell” was really super good at, it was taking a serious issue and turning it into a very forced and melodramatic issue, which usually always resulted in some of the funniest morning programming this planet has seen this side of “The 700 Club.” Anytime this show ventured into the “Very Special Episode” arena, the result was absolute comedy gold.

I can’t even pick out my favorite part of this episode because it is just 22 solid minutes of unintentional comedy and picking one scene would be like trying to choose which of your children is your favorite. (PS – The correct answer is the first-born. Sorry everyone else, you were probably a mistake). Let’s breakdown the absurdities of this episode:

  • Johnny Dakota, early-90s Hollywood movie star/teen idol, is hanging out at a high school, which is actually the most believable part of this episode. The part that should be really hard to believe is that his drug of choice is pot. I mean let’s get real, this guy was probably blasting rails in the bathroom at The Viper Room with River Phoenix and the Coreys, not smoking ditch weed in the bathroom at Bayside.
  • Johnny Dakota hosts a “rap session” where he asks the kids how they feel about drugs. Jessie tells her harrowing tale of that one Thursday where she took 4 caffeine pills and got really excited and ruined Hot Sundae. It is such a stupid story my only response to it is this: 

  • When Johnny offers Kelly a joint at the party, the one he hosted for high school kids, the look on her face is the look of terror I would expect from someone who just heard the death rattle of their only child. I assume Tiffani Amber-Thiessen getting super high right before the scene accomplished this effect.
  • The PSA…oh, the PSA. Danger, I suspect you have feelings about the PSA. Please proceed. 

DG: Oh, yes. Let’s talk about the PSA. I love that once they found out Johnny Dakota smoked pot, they immediately went to the backup plan of “Eh, let’s just use some random high school students and bring in a TV executive that the kids we are trying to reach will assuredly not recognize or relate to.” If Belding REALLY knew Brandon Tartikoff, wouldn’t the better idea have been to ask him to make a call and try to get a different star? He has hundreds of them in his Rolodex. It would have been so easy. It’s such an awesomely defeatist move to be like, “What? Johnny smokes pot? Ok, throw the whole thing in the toilet.”

Also, if I may take us a little off course, Belding knew the head of NBC? And this never came up again? Think of all the times the gang tried to raise money for something or break into the entertainment business. Like, every episode, right?

I guess my point is this: Apparently Belding will make a call to fix a drug PSA that will bring the school some good PR, but when his students are in dire need of a couple thousand bucks, or even just a contact to help them follow a dream, Belding hangs them out to dry and refuses to call his millionaire media mogul buddy. What an a-hole.

One final note: Johnny Dakota? A+ work, whoever came up with that name. Not even joking.

LS: Two final thoughts on what you just said:

  1. Belding is a total dickshoulder.
  2. This formula for naming fictional characters: (Common First Name) + (Any State) = Awesome, should be called the Johnny Dakota Theorum. Try it out: Steven Indiana, Ellen Arizona, Franklin Colorado, Jenny Idaho, and of course Robert California and Ron Mexico. I guess Hannah Montana would be the exception that proves the rule?

*51

LOLSlater and Danger Guerrero’s Top Five Saved By The Bell Moments:

#4 - Zack and Slater Fighting

DG: My favorite part of this scene is that, in a series filled with ludicrous plot devices (“WE STRUCK OIL!”; “WE’RE ROCK STARS NOW!”; “SCREECH HAS A SENTIENT ROBOT AND NO ONE MAKES A BIG DEAL ABOUT EVEN THOUGH HE’S LIKE 17 AND THAT WOULD BE A MAJOR SCIENTIFIC BREAKTHROUGH EVEN TODAY!”), this one is actually grounded in reality. Meatheaded high school guys fight over girls all the time. And given their history with Kelly, and general reputation as swordsmen, it’s kind of shocking Zack and Slater didn’t fight more often. There had to be tons of overlap in their love lives, which, for teenage dudes with enough testosterone coursing through their veins to power a city, would lead to almost constant conflict. The two of them should have been bashing their heads together like male rams every other episode. (Between Zack’s gratuitously gelled hair and Slater’s iron tight curls, enterprising young Bayside bookies would have had a hell of a time setting the line in that one.)

The other thing I love about the scene is the trash talk, especially when Slater says “Hey, you started it man, making me look like a jerk at The Max,” and Zack replies “Well, that’s what you are.” I’d love to mock this for being horrible dialogue, but it’s more accurate than you’d think. Again, meathead high school bros are not exactly known for their verbal acuity. I once saw a fight break out in my high school where the entire lead-up consisted of one guy calling someone a dickhead and smacking books out his hands, and that guy ripping his shirt of and yelling “THAT’S IT. LET’S GO.” And, sure enough, they went.

So, yeah. Compared to the lunacy of the rest of the show, this scene was like “The Wire.”

LS: I had a hard time deciding which clip from “The Fight” episode I should post for two reasons:

  1. Both of the scenes where Zack and Slater fight are just terrific.
  2. I knew this was the most important decision I was going to have to make today because I’m a really good grown up.

Anyway, the scene Danger is talking about can be seen here. In my opinion, it might have been the best acted scene in the entire series. I’m serious. Like DG said, the dialogue was actually pretty accurate, the fight actually looks kinda legit, and the only complaint I can lodge is that Slater didn’t rip his shirt off before the fight began because it would have been awesome to hear the audience do that “WOOOOOOOOOO!!” thing right before Zack punched him in the face. There would have been so many emotions for the studio audience.

I figured since DG covered the first fight scene, I’d talk about the second, and final, fight scene.  As I watch it again, for probably the millionth time in my life, I think this probably should be higher than 4th on this list, mostly because it contains a wonderful array of awkward interactions between characters and some earnest attempts at acting out a scene that really stood no chance of being well acted.  

First, Zack and Slater are fighting over punch, which is…perfect. Second, after Zack pours said punch down Slater’s back, Slater does this weird shimmy/dance move that will always and forever make me laugh. Third, any fight that involves shoving a ladle down the front of someone’s pants is probably the best fight you’ll ever witness. Whoever wrote that is a genius. Fourth, Belding’s wig acts as some sort of deus ex machina that saves the friendship. I’m 100% certain this is the only time a wig has served this purpose on film, or real life probably. Fifth, this exchange between Zack and Slater is just the best. THE BEST!

Slater: LOOK PREPPY, YOU’RE ALL WET!!

Zack:  YEAH, YOU TOO!!

[Everyone realizes they are the worst. Scene]

This whole episode is fantastic and I am not being sarcastic. It really is a gift to humanity. Thanks NBC.

*88

LOLSlater and Danger Guerrero’s Top Five Saved By The Bell Moments:

#5 - Anytime Slater Dances

LOLSlater: I’ll be honest; Slater dancing was the main inspiration for this blog. I was getting ready for work one morning, watching the episode where Slater apologizes to Jessie for some injustice by stripping off his breakaway Z. Cavariccis (PS – That is a million dollar idea; you’re welcome Z. Cavariccis) to reveal a full body spandex unitard and I thought, “Why did this happen to us? Not just once, but several times. Someone should talk about this.” I really enjoy thinking about a room full of grown men sitting down and writing a scene where a teenage boy ends up dancing in spandex because that happens ALL OF THE TIME and just makes perfect sense. I mean, they shoehorned that into a shockingly large number of episodes. Of course I would expect to see something like that zero times, so I consider any number higher than zero to be shockingly large. Anyway, there are few things in this show that provide me with greater joy than seeing Mario Lopez bust out some sick dance moves while dressed the maximum amount of spandex possible. Oh wait, I guess “Saved By the Bell” was just the original “Glee.” Never mind.

Anyway, I’m too lazy to go back and link to each instance of Slater dancing that was documented on this blog, but I would guess there is roughly 10GB of video of him prancing about in various states of undress. It is totally worth looking through 200 pages of blog for.

Mildly fun fact: Mario Lopez danced within the first 60 seconds of the very first episode of SBTB, and within the last 5 minutes of the final episode. The whole series was bookended by awkward Slater dances. A+ to the producers for that.

Danger Guerrero: Here’s my question: Do you think Slater was always supposed to be such a dancing maniac? Like, when they created the character? Because if that was the case, it would make him one of the more fascinating fictional creations of all-time. A multi-sport star athlete, military brat, and mechanic, who ALSO happens to be gifted at less typically masculine activities like modern dance and ballet? In the world of stereotypes that “Saved by the Bell” occupied, A.C. Slater was kind of groundbreaking in that way.

On the other hand — and this is way more likely — maybe Mario Lopez just loved to dance and was always pestering the producers about giving Slater more opportunities to show off his moves. I could totally see him doing this. I could also see the producers shoehorning in a gratuitous 30 second scene just to shut him up for a week or two. To be honest, I’m surprised this doesn’t happen today while he’s hosting “Extra.”

In conclusion, while we’re on the subject of dancing television characters, I just want to point out that Slater couldn’t hold a candle to my boy Turkleton. Not even close.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=81NpdkTcMAE

(Source: lolslater)

*10

Your Daily Reminder

Danger Guererro and I will be counting down our 5 favorite “Saved By the Bell” moments next week, and then we will be answering any of your SBTB related queries. Submit your questions here, and have a completely adequate Christmas or something.

*24
Yeah man, I guess we are done here.

Yeah man, I guess we are done here.

Thoughts on the parting advice from the gang at Bayside:

  1. Jessie - Thanks Al Gore.
  2. Slater - That is really sad for you.
  3. Lisa - Very decent advice. I knew we could count on you.
  4. Screech - Yes, but for the love of all things holy, DO NOT MAKE A SEX TAPE WITH THEM.
  5. Kelly - Then take that lemonade and throw it in the face of the person who gave you that stupid lemon to begin with.
  6. Zack - That is just dumb. Everyone knows ages 22-24 are the best years of your life. Unless you decide to go to law school. Then you are have ruined your life.

*27

LOLSlater: The Final Countdown

I’m going to reblog this several times between now and this weekend, so I sort of apologize…but not really. Submit your questions to Danger Guerrero and me right HERE. We’d love to answer any of your Saved By the Bell related queries, and let’s be honest…when are you going to get answers to these stupid questions/observations ever again?  

lolslater:

As many of you may have noticed this blog has jumped the shark harder than SBTB did when Tori showed up and we were supposed to not notice that Kelly and Jessie had obviously been sent off to rehab without so much as a going away bender. Anyway, this is final episode of “Saved By the Bell,” which…